Have you ever taken a necessary journey into your past? This can be a painful or perhaps healing process or it can be a little of both. 

Having suffered a date rape while working for Wycliffe Bible Translators when I was in my early 20’s, with the result being an unforeseen pregnancy, I had to leave my much beloved job and return home.  Because of the fact that God is the giver and taker of life, I carried my baby full term and gave birth to her Christmas Eve.  She was adopted into a Christian home.  My greatest desire is to find her ‘God willing’ very soon.

My journey was to the Wycliffe Headquarters, where, when I left, only the director knew the reason behind it.  After 32 years, I was not even sure if anyone would still be there that I once knew and worked with.  Well, there were not one, but three people.  One exclaimed ‘Gloria!  You haven’t changed at all!  How are you?’                                ‘Wow’, was all I could think. ‘ God, you are obviously going before me.’  Once I’d had the tour, I was able to speak with these amazing women about why I’d really left so long ago and what God had brought me through since that time.  There were lots of tears, and lots of hugs.  Painful but healing.

Not every journey into the past has the same outcome.  However, if God is asking you to do just that, He has a purpose.  He wants to heal you from your pain and sorrow.

The Psalmist David wrote his cry to God after he’d sinned by taking Bathsheba, a married woman to bed with him.  When she became pregnant, David made sure that her husband was killed in battle.  God’s desire for David was restoration.

Psalm 51a

For the director of music. A psalm of David. When the prophet Nathan came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba.

1.Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2.Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3.For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4.Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight;
so you are right in your verdict
and justified when you judge.
5.Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6.Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
you taught me wisdom in that secret place.
7.Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clan;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8.Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9.Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10.Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11.Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12.Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13.Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
so that sinners will turn back to you.

God loves you and I so much that He will pursue us until we are restored to Him once again.  Is it time to deal with your past dear one?  God will be with you when you do.